Where Are You?

Took the kids from kindergarten. Three-year-old insisted we should go to the swings. Five-year-old wanted to go to his friend. I needed to get to the post-office before closing time to mail a letter, and pay a long overdue bill.
"How have I fallen? Where has my peace of mind gone to?", the voices of silent horror shrieked in me.
"YOUR peace of mind?!", the clown awoke in appalled jest.
"Where are you now? Right Now?", asked the tender voice of mindfulness.

Talked to the kids. Explained necessities. Hugged and kissed… got some ice-cream to soften the trip to the post-office.

Letter mailed, bill paid, we made our choice of dinner at the mall. Among the hustle and bustle of people talking, shouting, laughing, shopping, I found a haven in the bounty of my noodles plate… the sheer joy of quenching hunger and thirst. Peace in the midst of the loud palace of mammon.

Sometimes my stomach gets the better of me.

De Profundis

I woke up with the wish-I-was-gone mood. Sat on my meditation cushion and breathed. Just sitting. Just breathing.
This yearning to crawl into a dark place and vanish, should I look into it? Observe its subtle movements? Isn't it dangerous? Might I not drown? Lose myself within this dark profundity?
An image came. I was diving in a dark ocean. Endless darkness… empty space all around me. There was a light someplace below. I swam towards it. While swimming, I suddenly noticed I'm well equipped with a diving suit, an air balloon, a mask. Why should you worry? I asked.
Suddenly, it was not so important to reach the light, to come out of the dark depth. There was beauty in the free-floating, empty space.